The Clerk is a Jerk... and so is the Manager

"The clerk is a jerk." That saying has been around my family for years. It came from a book, I think, which was popular at the time. It basically meant the clerk has zero authority and even less common sense, so if you have a problem, ask for the manager. I'm adding a corollary to that theory: The clerk is a jerk... and so is the manager."

Sunday evening rolled around, and no one felt like cooking, so I went to the local Arby's to get some vittles. Arby's has a promotion of 5 menu items for $5.95. Limited, basic menu items, but it was fine with me. I ordered 10 items for 4 people. The roast beef sandwich included some kind of liquid cheese sauce. I asked them to hold the cheese sauce. So at the drive through, they tell me my total is $15 and change. WHAT?! It should be $12, plus some tax. How did it get up to $15?

Well, since I had ordered the roast beef sandwiches without cheese, they charged me the "5 for $6.95" rate, as the "5 for $5.95" items include cheese sauce. The cashier was looking at me, dumbfounded, a bit afraid I may climb into the window. So I asked him to get his manager.

The manager comes to the window, and I ask "Why am I getting charged more for you to leave off cheese on my sandwiches?" I get the standard I-have-no-brain answer: "Because that's our policy. That's what they tell us to do." They? Who is this almighty they? They sure wields a lot of power.

I said "That's ridiculous. I don't want that liquid cheese sauce on my sandwiches. If you had real cheese, that would be one thing, but ti's the liquid stuff for nachos at a ballpark. When you are making my sandwiches, just leave it off. Skip that step. You'll be done quicker, and you will have made money by NOT giving me the cheese that I've paid for." The manager stubbornly said "we can't do that. If you want plain roast beef sandwiches, you have to pay the '5 for $6.95' rate." This guy was insistent that I take the cheese sauce to get the food at a lower price.

So I said "well, can you put the cheese sauce on the side? in little cups?" The manager said "Sure! We can do that!" and looked relieved to have found a solution upon which we could both agree. I said "Great, do that." I paused, then I sort of whispered loudly to him "and by the way, you can keep the cheese in the cups... I won't be using it." He conceded defeat and charged me $12 plus tax for my 10 items. With NO cheese sauce.

This reminded me of that movie with Jack Nicholson, I think it was... I can't remember the name off-hand. He was in a diner, and ordered toast. The waitress replied that they don't have toast. He said "you don't' sell toast?" She said no. So he said "Well, how do you make your BLT sandwiches?" She said it's Bacon, Lettuce, and Tomato on toasted bread." He said "OK, then give me a BLT, hold the bacon, hold the lettuce, and hold the tomato." She obliged him and brought him toast.

Sometimes people get so caught up in rules, policies, procedures, and doing what They told them to do, and brains seem to cease functioning. You see it more often at places requiring little skill or education, like fast food restaurants or big corporate entities that rely on a minimum wage employee to deal with their customers. Then one of them gets promoted and he's called a manager. It doesn't mean they have any more common sense than the average order-taker. It just means he gets to stay late and has a key to lock up at night.